On New Year's day this year, my father died. Hence, my sudden trip back to Germany. My parents were divorced when I was a little boy and throughout the past 23 years the relationship with my father sometimes struggled. However, these past few years him and I really tried hard and things got much better. Even though, I didn't grow up around my father, we shared many of the same characteristics. A superb sense of humor and the inability to use it appropriately being just two of them. He was also an excellent ping pong and accordion player who had an unrepeated talent of entertaining even the largest of crowds. But most of all, he was a family man who could do noone harm. It is hard to describe what his loss means to me, which I'll only continue to realize as life progresses. I am thankful that him and I broke the grudge between us. Without it, I'd have a hard time looking in the mirror these days. So don't hold grudges. In the end, life is entirely too short for that and all the small things don't really matter. I miss my father and will never ignore the large part of his that lives inside of me.