Chapter 1 – It doesn’t matter what planet you’re from!

I’ll never understand why women read these books.  They’re never accurate.  One guy’s take on an entire race of women versus men creates a revolution in sensitivity?  Hardly.  Men aren’t sensitive types.  Why do women keep thinking we think like them?  We’re not bred that way.  We’re not born into this world with an X or Y chromosome.  We’re born with an S chromosome.  S being for stubborn (I know, you were thinking S for sex).    

Stubborn we are, stubborn we’ll always be.  We want everything our way.  We want big tires on our cars, toilet paper that comes off the bottom of the roll, and unscented hand lotion in our bathrooms.  We don’t view the world as some pansy ass metrosexual, at least not at my age.  I don’t go to salons and get my hair dyed three colors.  I shave my head.  I’d never be caught dead sitting in a chair with tin foil in my hair.  That’s for girls, not guys.  Let’s face it, our heroes are Hunter S. Thompson and Lance Armstrong; guys who pick themselves up, dust off the dirt and keep on going.  Not those queer eye guys who just dust.

Written by Jerry at Kim be gone