the perfect girl

Ever since graduating from college, I’ve been fortunate enough to enjoy lots of good luck and success. My career has been fun and rewarding and I’ve had the chance to work with many smart and nice folks in Seattle, LA and now Portland. With the exception of my biological father’s death, my family is healthy and doing well. My mother is proving that one doesn’t need a college degree to be a highly paid consultant to a Fortune 500 corporation, while my dad is attempting to prove the world that one doesn’t need an email address to run a business. So far, my mum is winning. My sisters are growing up to be beautiful and smart women, and my grandparents are well and healthy. Heck, I even still have a great grandmother. And besides my 3-month old sinus infection, my health couldn’t be better.

Things are a little different when it comes to myself and the other gender. While I have lots of great female friends, I just can’t seem to find the right girlfriend. Now just to be clear, I am fully aware that my inability to maintain any sort of long-term romantic relationship leads right back to Mr. Mario, himself. I’ve been in a few relationships over the last couple of years, always with amazing women who far surpassed my expectations in many regards. Actually all my female counterparts were probably much better than myself at contributing to a successful relationship. With that being said, all my past relationships ultimately failed because my intuition told me that I wasn’t with the woman who I’d spend the rest of my life with. And the minute I get that feeling, the relationship is practically over. I struggle for a little while, feel terrible and then resign myself from the relationship. Then I promise myself that next time I’ll know better and won’t put another girl through the complicated intricacies of my romantic intuition, or the lack thereof.

How does that work anyways? I guess I wouldn’t just quit my job knowing that I wasn’t going to spend the rest of my life working there? And if I did, then I’d probably get a new job right away. Is always trusting your heart really the way to go? If I always trusted my heart in soccer games, I would have gotten red carded even more often than I already have.

Then again, I also might be doing the right thing which I’d inevitably find out the moment that I do run across the future Ms Mario. Or 50 years thereafter. In the meantime I’ll keep trusting my intuition when it comes to women, and distrust such when it comes to my behavior at soccer games.